Official Diagnosis

So I’ve talked about my depression and anxiety a little on this site, but it is hard to talk about sometimes because mental illness is still seen as somewhat taboo. Due to some FMLA paperwork I submitted for my job, I found out that my official diagnosis had changed from Major Depressive Disorder to Bipolar 2.

This might not seem like a big deal to some of you, but it sort of devastated me. Bipolar 2 is

A less severe type of bipolar disorder characterized by depressive and hypomanic episodes.

It is a lifelong illness and does not have a cure only treatment. My aunt is bipolar, so it runs in my family, but seeing those words on paper broke my heart. It was as if seeing my future in front of me but something blocked the path.

I know that it does not decide who I am, but I feel that I am traveling through this life with a monkey on my back. That, with meds and therapy, I can keep the monkey where belongs give me a little bit of hope, but I am still unsure of how I feel about it. I guess that makes the metaphor work. Whatever.

Comment Starters
1. How did you react when you received a diagnosis you didn’t want to acknowledge?
2. Tell me of your own experiences of dealing with mental illness.

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One thought on “Official Diagnosis

  1. My hardest diagnosis was my arthritis, even though it was a surprise. I was devastated. I was 18 years old, getting ready to go off to college, and now I had a fist full of medicines to take.

    As for the mental illness, I do the best I can. I’ve hit rock bottom. I know what that feels like. I only seek help for my depression when I feel myself sliding that way. I don’t take medicines for it because I don’t like the way they make me feel. I’ve never sought help for my anxiety and panic attacks, though. As long as I can deal with it, I won’t.

    If I get to the point where I can’t handle it, I will seek help. I have an incredible support group that will point out to me when I need help as well.

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